I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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