ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Randomize