I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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