so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just googled if crying burns calories
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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