i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
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