Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize