Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
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Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
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When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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