Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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