I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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