I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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