Duck Duck Cougar?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
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