I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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