she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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