apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Randomize