Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Randomize