Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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