Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize