i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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