We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Liz is crying about burritos again.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
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