Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Randomize