why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize