I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize