he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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