Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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