I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
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