I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
So much Jack, so little girl.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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