8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
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