It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
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You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
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I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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