Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize