dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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