How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
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