and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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