All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize