i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize