you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
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