Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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