chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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