Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
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Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
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How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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