there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sick fucks of a feather flock together
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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