Fuck appropriateness.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize