i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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