what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
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and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
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Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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