we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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