Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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