Already got asked if we're dating
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize