I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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