so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
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But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
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