Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize