You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Randomize