is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
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She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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